Gifted Clay:
There is so much I want to say about the fact that I will be turning 40 this Wednesday, April 7th. My first thoughts are “wow”. I am amazed by it all. I just wanted to lead into the whole “turning 40 thing” by reflecting on where I am now in my life. I am in a strange place (lol). Yes, Melody Sherra is having a difficult time defining her moment. I am normally so excited about any reason to celebrate be it a birthday, holiday, accomplishment or just having friends over—no matter the reason (I’ll create one most times), I love a meaningful party and reason to cook for friends and loved ones. But the kicker this year is that I have not planned a big celebration for such a momentous occasion as turning the big 4-0. So, I need you guys to help me figure it all out. So let’s talk about my life up until now (and perhaps yours)…
First, I want to say that I am so very grateful to God for all that he has done and provided for my life. I have been so blessed to love and be loved by some fantastic people. The first person that I have loved and received love from is my mom. My mom has been my mother, friend and sister for my entire life. Guys, she has been there for me. I am her oldest and youngest (you figure it out…lol). She has stood with me through the storms and the sunshine. I could not ask for more in a mother. I pray to SOON be able to show my appreciation to her in a way that fully expresses my gratitude. She has been such a strong source of wisdom and pure love in my life. I love her like “out the y-zoo”—-SMILE.
Secondly, I want to thank the family that God gave me over 35 years ago. Yes, the Tolberts are my family—proven time and time again. My Aunty Nan is so, so very dear to my heart. You guys will never know. Daddy Odie, Alisa, Carla, Odie III complete the family line-up (lol). Plus, the years have included their spouses and kids (especially my god-daughter, Caitlin) who I have included as family as well—plus you too, Jasmene (smile). It is not every day that heaven chooses a family for you from out of seemingly “nowhere” and they remain faithful to you and to your life for over 35 years—-yes, I AM BLESSED.
Then, there is my best friend for the past 14 years “Mrs. Perry”, herself (lol). World, there is no one like her (lol). But I guess that’s what makes her who she is in my life. Her husband is my brother and he knows what I mean when I say “one and only”—I’m laughing. But Gifted Clay, she has been there through thick and thin. We have lasted first because God brought us together and secondly because we have learned to appreciate and respect our differences. She is the one person that I can just be “real” with and still hang the phone up laughing. Our stories of mountains and valleys will probably be in the context of a book or business venture of some type together one day in the near future. It took a while to really trust each other because we are so very different. But I began to look at the fact that we never stopped pursuing the friendship—even through the initial stages and we never remained angry with each other about anything. How interesting is that. She is just waiting for me to be married so that we will have new chapters of our book to write together (smile). She’s been married over 20 years and I am single—just one more interesting twist to our time-tested friendship. Don’t worry BF, I will be catching up with you….very soon (lol).
What’s funny, is that so many of the people that I have loved and that have loved me during my almost 40 years are no longer living. Let me begin with my great-grandmother (I called her Mama). You guys, she was the greatest. My maternal grandmother died before I was born so I never got to meet her. But “Mama” more than made up for it. My mom worked 5 days a week and so I stayed with Mama and Daddy (which is what I called my great-grandfather, whom I loved like none other. He passed away when I was 14). Mama and Daddy were the world to me and I stayed with them every Monday through Friday during the first 5 years of my life. How amazing was that. I was so fortunate to have their love, discipline and guidance for the time that heaven lent them to me. Mama was a petite woman who loved me in such a profound way. I could never fully express in this manner how much she sowed into my life. She trained me at three years old to begin doing laundry and cutting out biscuits. Wow, how much I appreciate it. But most of all, she taught me how to love and respect others. Daddy, on the other hand was my protector and the one who took me to buy popsicles when the kids ridiculed me about my chocolate skin. He helped to train me to love myself during the 14 years of my life that he lived. He would call me practically every day to make sure I was okay and that I knew he loved me. Man, what love! Mama loved me as though I was from her womb. She passed away when I was 27 years old. She had lived to be 99 and she died simply because her heart had worn out from old age. She had no major health problems. Just a lot of love to give me. Thank God for them both. The other person who died too soon was like an angel in my life from the age of 3 to years old. His name was L.D. I CONSIDERED HIM MY ANGEL OF FAITHFULNESS, despite the challenges that he had to overcome in his everyday life. My mom and I met L.D. through a mutual friend when I was only 3 years old. Gifted Clay, listen to me: This man met us one day and declared that he would take me under his wings as though I was his biological daughter. He and my mom only had a standard friendship and he was never in any way inappropriate with me—-in other words, “no strings attached”. It was important that I said that before I tell you what he did for me for over 25 years (until he passed away). Listen to this: He came to my house every two weeks (NEVER MISSING A WEEK) and gave me $100 from his paycheck and I never asked for one cent. He also called and checked on me EVERY SINGLE DAY until he passed away. He never missed a paycheck or a phone call. That hundred dollars came bi-monthly like clock work. He said he was doing “God’s work” in my life. What made it even more interesting was that L.D. COULD NOT read, write or drive. He worked hard every day as a school custodian (never missed a day of work until his health failed) What an unusual story of faithfulness in its truest sense. What a story.
And last but certainly not least, in remembering those that loved me but passed away…. God blessed my life with a fabulous older brother that was as close of a brother that I could have ever asked for. I always wanted an older brother to help me to better handle and understand life. Being the only child, I do not have any biological brothers, but I could not tell the difference with Byron. He loved me, protected me, enjoyed my cooking(smile), talked to me night and day, helped me to understand life’s issues, made me laugh all the time and promised me that he would walk me down the aisle when I got married. He left too soon. He was “one of a kind”. I will hold his memory in my heart forever. We were so close as siblings until, when his health failed and he realized his death was upon him, he requested something so very big from me. He said that he wanted me to be at his bedside when he took his last breath. My mouth said “yes” but in my heart I knew that would be too much for me to bear. After I walked out of his room during my last visit with him (not knowing it was the last), the nurse said that he passed away just 5 minutes after I left his room. I knew then in my heart that Byron knew that I could not bear to see him take his last breath. He then waited until I left to pass into heaven. He still protected me until the bitter end. That is not the type of love that life brings you every day. I’ll treasure this for a lifetime.
Wow, reminiscing about those who have passed on takes a lot out of you emotionally…but worth it.
Let me move on back into the present …Let me continue by adding a few other names to the list of those who have loved me and shaped me into who I am and to who I am becoming. Love, on any level, has a profound way of shaping your life for greatness. I am very blessed. Okay, let me now speak of my friend Renee who has been so very supportive of everything I do. She is an “anointed fireball” in ministry. We are so different in our manner of dress and our approach to life. But that’s what makes our friendship work. We both love God. We both have our respective ministries. We have a quest for life’s best. We share our ups and downs. And we respect our differences and learn from one another. She’s the best kind of support and balance for. At the end of the day, it works well.
I must also tell you all about my “diva-driven” friend (smile) Shereneta. She and I have had so many late night conversations on our cell phones about the many colors of life (lol). We have helped to keep our phone companies in business (smile).We have talked about reaching goals, life, men, God and everything else that we seek to understand. We’ve had a hilarious ride. She has been there for me and I’ve seen her strength shine through, especially in the loss of her mother. Let me add that it was a sudden loss. Her mom left home to go to church one “normal” Sunday morning and was struck and killed by a police officer who ran a red light. She was as close to her mom as I am to mine. So her pain was massive.. But she recovered and kept moving forward. I will always admire her for that.
The now we come to someone who has come to mean the world to me because he has filled the huge void left by the passing of my big brother Byron 11 years ago. I refer to him affection ally as “Docc”. Though he was not aware of it at the time, he entered my life at a time of great transition. I was facing a lot and he did not even know it. But through time and circumstance our comradery grew into family. It seems that I awakened one day and he had taken over the role of Big Brother that Byron once held. I am amazed to this day. He is such a source of knowledge love and influence in my life. I can talk to him about anything (and visa versa). He thinks I am a unique individual and I think the same about him (that’s a family joke). Plus, I taught him everything he knows (lol).
It would take forever to speak of everyone who has loved me these first 40 years of my life. But I am so grateful to them (you) all. Many of you reading this are the ones that I am referring to. Thank you so very much for accepting me and my vision of life into your world. Whether I have known you a little while or a life-time, thank you so very much for making a choice to add love to my life. I am so very grateful to know you.
I must end by saying that I do look forward to the man who will give Docc a chance to walk me down the aisle. Love in the form of marriage and a future family are all a part of the treasure that The Master Potter is molding to fit in place in my life for the next 40 years —YIPPEE!!! (LOL). Stay tuned…
Happy 40th Birthday to Me!
Manifested Dreams in 2010!
Melody Sherra…
. Just remember, that you are still you, just upgraded 
